Well when I was a kid I would take a trip
Every summer down to "Mississipp,"
To visit my Granny and her antebellum world.
I'd run barefooted all-day long,
Climbing trees free as a song;
One day I happened to catch myself a squirrel.
Well I stuffed him down in an old shoe box,
And punched a couple holes in the top;
When Sunday came I snuck him in the Church.
I was sittin' way back on the very last pew
Showin' em' to my good buddy Hugh,
When that squirrel got loose and went totally berserk.
Well what happened next is hard to tell;
Some thought it was Heaven others thought it was Hell,
But the fact that something was among was plain to see.
As the choir sang " I Surrender All",
The squirrel ran up Harv Newman's coveralls,
And Harv leaped to his feet and said something's got a hold on me!
The day the squirrel went berserk
In the First Self-Righteous Church
In that sleepy little town of Pascagoula.
It was a fight for survival
That broke out in revival.
They were jumpin' pews and shoutin' "Hallelujah".
Well Harv hit the aisles dancin' and screamin'.,
Some thought he had religion others thought he had a demon,
And Harv thought he had a weed-eater loose in his fruit-of-the-looms.
He fell to his knees to plead and beg,
And the squirrel ran out of his britches leg;
Unobserved to the other side of the room.
All the way down to the AMEN pew,
Where sat Sister Bertha Better-than-You,
Who had been watching all of the commotion with sophistic glee.
But shoot, you should have seen the look in her eyes
When that squirrel jumped her garters and crossed her thighs.
And she jumped to her feet and said, "Lord have mercy on me."
As that squirrel mad laps inside her dress
She began to cry and then to confess,
To sins that would make a sailor blush with shame.
She told of gossip, and church dissention,
But the thing that got the most attention
Was when she talked about her love life and then she started naming names.
The day the squirrel went berserk
In the First Self-Righteous Church
In that sleepy little town of Pascagoula.
It was a fight for survival
that broke out in revival.
They were jumpin' pews and shoutin' "Hallelujah".
Well seven deacons and the pastor got saved,
And twenty-five thousand dollars got raised,
And fifty volunteered for missions in the Congo on the spot.
And even without an invitation
There were at least five hundred re-dedications,
and we all got re-baptized whether we needed it or not.
Now you've heard the Bible story I guess
Of how He parted the waters for Moses to pass.
Oh the Miracles God has wrought in this old world.
But the one I'll remember till my dying day
Is how He put that church back on the narrow way
With a half crazed Mississippi squirrel.
The day the squirrel went berserk
In the First Self-Righteous Church
In that sleepy little town of Pascagoula.
It was a fight for survival
That broke out in revival.
They were jumpin' pews and shoutin' "Hallelujah".
Can a squirrel save your soul?
Ray stevens is a genius.
Reply:That was far too long for me to bother. I'll assume you said this:
"Squirrels are awesome, because they guard their nuts."
Yes they are.
Reply:Even a squirrel has enough sense to save a few nuts for the Winter. But man laughs at everything.
Reply:Keep smoking that stuff and an Ant can save your soul....
Reply:I certainly hope so, Craigerz. I wish one would have saved me from reading your nutty "question".
Reply:That was too long, I lost interest after the first sentence. Squirrels are just rats that live in trees.
Reply:Why don't people understand the brilliance of Mr. Steven's "Mississippi Squirrel Revival"?!
I think if the would just meditate on this song a bit, they would see the light.
Now, play me something classy....
"Oh yes they call him the streak,
Fastest thing on two feet....."
Reply:Catchy! This would make a great song! Lovin' it!
Reply:and was laughing all the way.
Where did you get this?
Reply:i have no clue what that was all about but if you mean can God use a squirrel to get people to come to him the answer is yes. to be honest though i do not believe a word of this story.
Reply:no
Reply:It can save your nuts.
neutral skin tone
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