What do you think? Spellbounding enough?

I wrote it. Tell me what you think?


Oh, and if you could think of a name that would be great!





walking down the dark path with the ghostly trees lining it.


Pat, crunch, go your shoes against the cold un-living ground.


You come to a cleared sop with a small pond in the middle.


BOOM!


A loud BOOM comes from behind you sparkles erupt behind youthey hit you right in the back, your eye-sight goes blurryand a ghostly creature doubles before your eyes.Everything suddenly goes a threatening black.


YOU stubble to the ground.“Muhahaha....” is heard faintly in the distance.....


THE FOLLOWING DAY


You wake up crumbled up in a ball, shivering to your dry bones,your memory slowly comes back, and you recall being...SPELLED!Your strength is varied since most of it was taken when you were spelled.YOU scrambe up and run out and back to the path...Returning home, you slump down in the big chair next to the fire.Before you know it you’re telling your grandchildren.


They sit before you in awe,


"Muhahaha..."

What do you think? Spellbounding enough?
NICE!!!!!! Me likey!!!! what about this name: "The steps to the unknown world"
Reply:It might be a bit more "spellbinding" if you weren't "spellbound" by bad grammar and didn't make so many spelling errors. Listen, I'm doing you a favor by being candid and straighforward, so don't be offended. Keep writing but seriously study a good textbook once in a while. Oh, and what the----is a "cleared sop?"
Reply:Spelling aside, it's not poetry. It's not even good prose. It's some of the worst writing I have seen on YA in over a month. Why do people think drivel is poetry just because they call it that. If I hadn't already published 3 poetry books, I might be tempted to give up poetry writing, and go back to paperback novels. I really hate to say bad things about something you did yourself, and the effort is commendable, but please learn the basics of poetry writing before trying to convince the world you can write poetry.
Reply:its great i injoyed it.


for the name maybe a dark night or spelled
Reply:"One Freaky Scene" thats what popped in my head as a title i love it soooooooooo much is it a story or poem?
Reply:Ignore the first reply who cares about spelling if it is completley and totally awzm



visual arts